“The chest progression is worse than the brain tumors,” said the radiation oncologist who visited me at the hospital bed last night. According to him the mass in the lung causes the shortness of breath and shooting the cancer cells to the brain.
Looking at the CT taken today, the radiation oncologist may treat the lung mass first before the brain tumors.
Until two weeks ago, I was driving the car and expecting to fly to Washington D.C..
Yet now circumstance has changed 180 degree and heading to the worst.
A nurse came and asked me, “So how do you think about this situation? ”
” One at a time. Depends on the CT result, the situation may change. ….I’m a Christian, so I’m not afraid of death. The death is like going to the new world. I just don’t want to suffer on the process of dying.”
Listening that the nurse was Christian, too, I continued.
“Since I decided to follow Jesus, my life has been in God’s hand. He knows the best for me. If He says this is the time for me to go Home, it must be the right time. If He thinks I should live a little longer, He will give me more time. Even suffering and agony, the Bible said, ‘compared to the glory waiting ahead, it is just for the short time.’ So I have to focus on that.”
Pleading for the miracle, I pray “Thy Will be done on me.”again.