I had thought I would have been on Kaiser’s bed at least this weekend, but surprisingly, on Friday Morning, a doctor ordered a discharge of me. I could come home in the afternoon!
PRAISE THE LORD!!
Being so excited that I thought even the anniversary trip might be still possible. Yet as soon as I got up from the bed, I noticed that was a wrong expectation. I was still weak, coughing like a mad dog, and getting out of breath easily.
At the hospital, I was not allowed to take a shower because I was too weak. So the first thing I wanted to do at home was taking a shower.
Yet, looking at the same mess as the time I left, I wanted to wash dishes in the sink, put away plates from the dish washer, sweep the floor, put away the laundry George washed, and email back to people to let them know I got home.
Home is the best place, but it is very difficult to be still and rest. By the time I got out from the shower I was so exhausted being about ready to collapse, and realized that I was recuperating, but not fully recovered yet.
If I won’t recover completely, I can’t resume chemo, which is life threatening just like pneumonia, and I will keep putting a big burden on George, who has Parkinson’s. I shouldn’t be foolish. If I love him, I need to depend on him for everything doing nothing for a while.
Another difficult thing at home is taking meds on time. While at the hospital, even though I was sleeping, a nurse woke me up to give me medicines, which are to taken every 12 hours, but certain hours before or after meals, here at home, I can barely control the time of getting up, or eating meals. At home the responsibility is increased.
I was scheduled to have a CT scan to evaluate the current regimen this Tuesday, but a radiology specialist may misread pneumonia as cancer or vice versa. As I asked the question, I was told that it would be better to postpone it in 3-4 weeks.
Well, it is nice to have a short break from nasty chemo, but I can’t afford to have a long one, so I have to be Lazy!!